a snapshot...just a real day

Today I slept until almost 9. Call me a sloth. The girls were tired and didn't wake. My son woke early as usual, but quietly went about his business building gadgets and gizmos, probably a time machine or some other creation of mechanical genius.

I padded downstairs and started to wrap my brain around my day while the kids made breakfast and Belle turned on PBS in Spanish. The living room was cluttered with school papers and new curriculum from the fair I attended last weekend. I hadn't bothered to clean the kitchen the night before, opting for cups of ginger peach coconut rooibus tea while I binge-watched JAG epidodes. My husband was at church band practice with my son and I couldn't quite muster up the motivation that I wanted. Maybe I didn't really want it...not sure. Anyway, the morning starts anew no matter my house state.

I didn't quite feel I had the energy to made a French press of coffee, but I also needed  my coffee, yes I did, don't judge. I think I need the ritual of preparing and sipping coffee as much as the dark brew itself. Grinding the beans, boiling water, steaming milk, plunking in sugar cubes, drizzling syrup, dusting cocoa powder. It slows my already overwhelmed and anxious mind. Sip, breathe, collect, repeat.

D headed to his room to plug away on his school. Cece headed upstairs to listen to her audio textbooks and work on her assignments. Belle continued to watch PBS and eat her breakfast, snuggling with her blanket, adorned in her Elsa nightgown which she rarely takes off. I took a shower and then headed back down to make my coffee. Let the ritual commence, and the day.

The morning disappeared, lunch came and went, school progressed, but not as much as anticipated. My choice--let's go see a movie. It's my birthday week, I wanted to see a movie, so we went. I loved Cinderella as much as I hoped--courage, kindness, forgiveness, so many themes and topics and truths bounced around my brain.

I had my girls on either side of me. Cece sits quietly, takes it in, smiles and comments sparingly. Belle interacts with the movie in loud whispers and mild sound affects while snacking constantly. During the end credits she decides to do ballet along the railing and then do leaps through the seats. She moves to the music no matter her location.

Several times, Cece leaned over, looked at me and asked, "Are you crying?" Of course I was, she knows. It was a rhetorical question. I always cry and it seems to be getting worse.

Midway through, Belle snuggles up to my arm, resting her head on my shoulder, still commenting occasionally and laughing a little too loud. When it comes time [spoiler alert] for the Prince to place the slipper on Ella's foot she declares, "I know what's gonna happen!" in her loud whisper, but still she has the trace of doubt, would it really turn out how it was supposed to? She starts rooting for the slipper, "Come on! Fit...fit! Fit!" in her continual loud whisper followed by statements of "I think I'm going to cry!" Real tears leak from her animated chocolate brown eyes.

D liked it too, but may have been more entertained (or annoyed) by his mom and two sisters. I heard him laughing, he can't fool me.

So, this snapshot day ended with taco salad, driving Cece to ballet and working out for me. My husband cleaned the kitchen while I was out, the piles of papers still sit and once the kids are settled, I'm looking forward to talking with my hubby...and maybe watching an episode of JAG while sipping hot tea.

Not a perfect day, but a good one, mostly. I'll take it with a heaping sweet spoonful of thankfulness and grace.

(Why random sunflower pictures? Because I love them. These were my birthday flowers from last year. Perfect.)